San Diego Figure Skating Communications
There are many times that you may be part of relationships that involve the dynamics existing between the following groups:
Fear of Dependency, by Dr. Scott Wetzler. pages 35-37.
The passive-aggressive individual is unsure of his/her autonomy & afraid of being alone, he/she fights dependency needs - usually by trying to control you.
Passive-Agressive Personality Disorder (PAPD) (sometimes referred to as a Negativistic Personality Disorder) Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders DSM 4th Edition
Published by the American Psychiatric Association
People with Passive-Aggressive Personality Disorder (PAPD) are characterized by covert obstructionism, procrastination, stubbornness, and inefficiency. Such behavior is a manifestation of passively expressed underlying aggression. In the DSM-IV the disorder is also called negativistic Personality Disorder (PD).
PAPD patients characteristically procrastinate, resist demands for adequate performance, find excuses for delays, and find fault with those on whom they depend; yet they refuse to extricate themselves from the dependent relationships. They usually lack assertiveness and are not direct about their own needs and wishes. They fail to ask needed questions about what is expected of them and may become anxious when forced to succeed or when their usual defense of turning anger against themselves is removed.
In interpersonal relationships, this type of individual may attempt to position themselves into a position of dependence, but others often experience this passive, self detrimental behavior as punitive and manipulative. People with this disorder expect others to do their errands and to carry out their routine responsibilities.
Friends and clinicians may sometimes try to reduce the patients' claims of unjust treatment. The close relationships of people with PAPD, however, are rarely tranquil or happy. Because they are bound to their resentment more closely than to their satisfaction, they may never even formulate goals for finding enjoyment in life. People with this disorder lack self-confidence and are typically pessimistic about the future.
PAPD must be differentiated from histrionic and borderline PD. Patients with PAPD, however, are less flamboyant, dramatic, affective and openly aggressive than those with histrionic and borderline Personality Disorder (PD).
PAPD patients who receive supportive psychotherapy have the prospect of a good outcome, but psychotherapy for these patients also has many pitfalls. To fulfill their demands is often to support their pathology, the refusal to agree to their demands is generally viewed as a rejection by the patient.
Therapy sessions can, thus, become a battleground on which the patient expresses feelings of resentment against the therapist on whom the patient wishes to become dependent. With these patients, clinicians must treat suicide gestures as any covert expression of anger, and not as object loss in major depressive disorder. Therapists should point out the probable consequences of PA behaviors as they occur. Such confrontations may be more helpful than a correct interpretation on changing patients' behavior.
The essential feature of a person with passive-aggressive personality (PAPD) disorder is a pervasive pattern of negativistic attitudes and passive resistance to demands for adequate performance in social and occupational situations that begins by early adulthood. These individuals routinely resent, oppose, and resist demands to function at the level expected by others.
This opposition occurs most frequently in work situations but can also be evident in social interactions. The resistance is expressed by procrastination, forgetfulness, stubbornness, and intentional inefficiency, especially in response to tasks assigned by authority figures.
The PAPD individual obstructs the efforts of others by failing to do their share of the work. A frequent excuse is that vital information was not communicated, materials were misplaced or misfiled. As a result there is insufficient time to do the work.
These individuals feel cheated, unappreciated, misunderstood, and chronically complain to others. When difficulties appear, they blame their failures on the behaviors of others. They may be sullen, irritable, impatient, argumentative, cynical, skeptical and contrary.
Any authority figure (e.g., a manager at work, a teacher at school, a parent, or a spouse who acts the role of a parent) become the focus of the PAPD's discontent. Because of their negativism and tendency to externalize blame, these individuals often criticize and voice hostility toward authority figures with minimal provocation.
They display envy and resentment towards peers who succeed or who are viewed by others as positive authority figures. The PAPD individual often complains about their personal misfortunes. They have a negative view of the future and may waver between expressing hostile defiance toward those they view as causing their problems and attempting to mollify these persons by asking forgiveness or promising to perform better in the future.
The PAPD individual is often overtly ambivalent, wavering indecisively from one course of action to its opposite. They may follow an erratic path that causes endless wrangles with others and disappointments for themselves. An intense conflict between dependence on others and the desire for self-assertion is characteristic of these individuals. Their self-confidence is often poor despite a superficial bravado. They foresee the worst possible outcome for most situations, even those that are going well. This defeatist outlook can evoke hostile and negative responses from others who are subjected to the complaints of these individuals. This pattern of behavior often occurs in individuals with Borderline, Histrionic, Paranoid, Dependent, Antisocial, or Avoidant Personality Disorders.
People with passive-aggressive behaviors are frequently encountered in authoritarian situations (e.g., work, military, prison) that do not tolerate other forms of assertiveness. Only when these passive- aggressive personality traits are inflexible, non-adaptive, and cause significant functional impairment or subjective distress do they constitute a disorder in these environments.
PAPD individuals can be superficially submissive; however, they like to control others without taking responsibility for actions, or anger, denies/refuses open statements of resistance/maintains own "good intentions."
Intentional but unconscious passivity hides aggression, represents a denial and confusion over his/her role in conflict, gives mixed signals hostile defiance alternating with contrition. An PAPD will be overly critical and making constant "left-handed" compliments, subtle attacks, blames, insults, and a litany of complains about others critical of everyone in authority or in a position with power/control over him/her. They use their fault-finding and unnecessarily prolonged argumentativeness as defense against intimacy/ commitment,
The following internet links have been gleaned from personal communications
combined with information from public institutions and athletic organizations/
associations that have a web presence with information concerning team and
individual sports programs:
ll materials are copy protected.
The limited use of the materials for education purposes is allowed providing
credit is given for the source of the materials.