Communicating Concepts

Hosted by
San Diego Figure Skating Communications

Friends Affect on Self Esteem

Friends Can Affect Your Self Esteem
        There are two major factors that negatively affects self esteem:
  • Putting yourself down,
  • Refusing to learn the skills that you lack to achieve self esteem. 
      What does this have to do with your friends?  How can your friends affect your self esteem?

      It is very doubtful that your friends have any training in psychology. Ill conceived advice that they might offer could adversely affect you in many ways. 

      Generally the individuals, who themselves often lack self esteem, keep doing negative things that  impact their lives. There is a saying that "Misery Loves Company".  Don't become involved in the negative thinking patterns of peers in your group. Following your friends poor advice is why parents attempt to guide you to take special care in your choice of friends. They know the damage that can occur because of your being associated with the actions of those in your close circle of friends.

      Everyone should be serious about avoiding the possible damage, caused by a poor choice of friends, that can damage your self esteem. You must make informed and intelligent choices in the friendships you cultivate. If you are proud of your friends, invite them home to meet your parents, a dinner invitation is an excellent way to accomplish this.  Being secretive about your friends and not mentioning them to your parents is a "Red Flag" that you sense your parents would not approve of them!

How Friends Affect Your Self Esteem
      Here are some ways that your friends can affect your self esteem:
  • Your friends can cause a dramatic reduction of your self esteem: People who feel inferior to others always keep comparing themselves to them and they try to find problems with themselves. These type of friend affects your self esteem because they frequently analyze you for as many possible flaws as they can find. These friends might make negative comments about your shirt, hair style or something you did. If you believe your friends, there could be a serious loss of your self esteem. However, once you understand that the problem is caused by their thinking patterns, your self esteem will not be affected.
  • Limiting your potential: Non ambitious people, who surround ambitious people, will try to put down everything you attempt to do and especially those things that they never managed to do. Don't underestimate the effect of such programming on your mind. The continues repetition of a statement by can turn falsehoods into a solid belief.
  • Your friends limiting beliefs can infect you:  One of the most powerful ways friends negatively affect your self esteem is by transferring her/her limiting beliefs to you. They will try to convince you their false beliefs are correct and you are very likely to believe him/her if your convictions and not strong enough to counteract their influence.
     Individuals who are self-confident are unlikely to put you down to strengthen their ego. The best way to prevent anyone from negatively affecting your self esteem is to understand that it is their own low self esteem which is responsible for their putting you down, criticizing your actions, or trying to destroy your comfort zone.

     It is unfortunate that people who lack self esteem will put down anyone attempting to do what they were never able to accomplish. Its all about their desire to maintain their false beliefs. If you are able to succeeded in doing something that your friends never were able to do will disrupt their belief systems to their core. Your success destroys all of the excuses they have used to explain why they are not successful in their own lives.

    When someone starts to put you down, the best way to prevent anyone from affecting your self esteem is to confront them forcefully to refute their statements as not being supported by the factual evidence. Don't back down, Strongly state that they will have to accept that you don't agree with them. Then proceed to prove them wrong by succeeding.

Recommended Reading:

Twelve Valuable Steps to Raise Your Self Esteem  Building high self-esteem is a process, not something you can develop overnight, " ... Whenever you say the affirmation, allow yourself to experience its positive message.

Developing Your Child's Self-Esteem   Self-esteem is a child's armor against the challenges of the world. Here's how you can promote healthy self-esteem in your kids.

PDF  Developing Self Esteem and a Positive Attitude include being able to take risks, having   The rewards of developing self esteem and positive relationships, not being held back by fears and insecurities, pursuing our dreams and ambitions.

Building Self-Esteem: A Self-Help Guide   It can be very difficult to feel good about yourself when you are under the stress of having symptoms that are hard to manage,

Building Self-Esteem with Youth, 4H-008-07  Developing positive self-esteem in children is an important responsibility for all adults who interact with them. When children feel good about themselves, they are better able to resist negative influences in their lives. Positive self-esteem enables children to grow up and be happy, responsible, and contributing adults.

How to Build a Positive Self Esteem - Health- Indiatimes   If you have low self-esteem, all you have to do is work a little harder and you will be able to build a positive self-esteem. Tips to Build Positive Self Esteem.


Introduction - Modifying Skills and Habits


The following internet links have been gleaned from personal communications
combined with information from public institutions and athletic organizations/
associations that have a web presence with information concerning team and
individual sports programs:

Seek Advice from an Expert

All materials are copy protected. 
The limited use of the materials for education purposes is allowed providing
credit is given for the source of the materials.

Athlete Concerns     Collection of Related Ideas    Skating Articles    Related Topics      

Ice Skating Rink Index    Topic Index    Site Index   Home Page